I have absolutely no clue what I’m doing. That’s not true. I have some idea, but it’s not really clear – it comes and goes depending on my current level of sanity. It’s as if I know what I’m doing, not too sure on the big picture though. I both know, and don’t know what I’m doing – Schroedinger’s conundrum, if you will. Half of me says, “Keep writing whatever comes to mind and don’t stop to look back. Just let the train of thought flow and everything will be okay.” While that’s not particularly bad advice, another part of me is laughing uncontrollably at the previous statement. You don’t wanna know what the other me’s think. /‽/Spoiler alert, they remain divided on the issue./‽/
This has been a culmination of frustration and desperation coupled with God given talent and skills that haven’t been kept very sharp. To explain further would ruin “it” so let’s just call this a segue to it all rather than an introduction. It will start to make sense after a while, scout’s honor (yes, I was actually a boy scout in my younger days), and if it doesn’t than… sorry. Just know that however frustrated you may feel, however low, worthless, angry, sad, whatever it is or might be in the future, what is most important is how you respond to it.
Cliché? Perhaps, but that makes it all the more valid. I know, because my response to the anger, frustration, sadness etc. was something I never expected it to be. My most private, hidden thoughts and emotions became a second skin, experiencing all life had to offer before my senses could even begin to analyze. All my creativity, sarcasm, faith and love now lay nude for the world to see. To paraphrase Marshall Mathers, I felt as if I was running away from something I wanted very badly.
So now, this. I know the above is probably the world’s worst introduction to a blog ever, but then again, this is no mere blog. For many, it will be an entrance into “their” world, which is really not so different from ours. In fact, the argument can (and will) be made that they are one in the same. Confused yet? Me too. If nothing else, please enjoy.
Stay tuned, and stay blessed.